Don't Touch My Junk (The TSA Hustle)

Album: not on an album (2010)
Play Video

Songfacts®:

  • This is an apparently humorous song that is nothing but, in fact it has a serious genesis and an even more serious message.

    In the wake of the 9/11 atrocities, the US Government passed the Aviation and Transportation Security Act which set up the Transportation Security Administration, an organization that is ostensibly responsible for the safety of the traveling public. Unfortunately, the TSA and its employees have gone about protecting the American public, particularly at airports, in a heavy-handed and at times brutal manner, which has included intimate body searches even on very young children that some people argue with no little justification amounts to nothing less than a sexual assault.

    On November 13, 2010, John Tyner was at San Diego International Airport where he decided he didn't want to be screened partly because of the possible health hazard from the radiation. He was told he would be have to undergo a pat down, which he subjected himself to, telling the TSA screener:
    "We can do that out here, but if you touch my junk I'm gonna have you arrested".

    Fortunately, Mr Tyner recorded this encounter for posterity. In the end he decided he didn't want to fly, but the TSA told him he couldn't leave the airport unless he submitted to the screening on the way out; they also threatened to fine him $10,000. For once, Big Brother and its servants went too far, and the TSA backed down.

    This incident inspired Mike Adams - the self-styled Health Ranger - to write and record "Don't Touch My Junk"; the song took him all of 9 hours to complete, including 440 recordings of his voice. >>
    Suggestion credit:
    Alexander Baron - London, England

Comments

Be the first to comment...

Editor's Picks

Donny Osmond

Donny OsmondSongwriter Interviews

Donny Osmond talks about his biggest hits, his Vegas show, and the fan who taught him to take "Puppy Love" seriously.

Mike Love of The Beach Boys

Mike Love of The Beach BoysSongwriter Interviews

The lead singer/lyricist of The Beach Boys talks about coming up with the words for "Good Vibrations," "Fun, Fun, Fun," "Kokomo" and other classic songs.

Emilio Castillo from Tower of Power

Emilio Castillo from Tower of PowerSongwriter Interviews

Emilio talks about what it's like to write and perform with the Tower of Power horns, and why every struggling band should have a friend like Huey Lewis.

How "A Rolling Stone Gathers No Moss" Became Rock's Top Proverb

How "A Rolling Stone Gathers No Moss" Became Rock's Top ProverbSong Writing

How a country weeper and a blues number made "rolling stone" the most popular phrase in rock.

Bill Withers

Bill WithersSongwriter Interviews

Soul music legend Bill Withers on how life experience and the company you keep leads to classic songs like "Lean On Me."

Lou Gramm - "Waiting For A Girl Like You"

Lou Gramm - "Waiting For A Girl Like You"They're Playing My Song

Gramm co-wrote this gorgeous ballad and delivered an inspired vocal, but the song was the beginning of the end of his time with Foreigner.