Your Love Is Killing Me

Album: Are We There (2014)
Play Video

Songfacts®:

  • Are We There is about Van Etten's extant relationship with a DJ named Christian, which has been on and off since the mid 2000s. She told The 405: "That song is relentless! I call that one the beast. It's really intense about loving someone so much that in a way it's creating a monster."

    "It's a masochistic song of 'yeah we're in this together but see what you're doing to me?' Reflecting on meeting somebody, knowing somebody and loving somebody," she added. "It's them seeing me at my weakest, at my most broken and asking if it's worth it."
  • Van Etten (from Mojo magazine): "I based the title (Are We There) on this photograph that I took years ago of a friend of mine when we were driving in her car in Tennessee. We would take turns screaming out the window and I took a photo of her as she was driving on a country road, screaming. It really was a huge transitional point in my life, because it's right before I decided to move to New York."
  • The song's music video was directed by Sean Durkin, who also helmed the 2011 movie Martha Marcy May Marlene and UK miniseries Southcliffe. The clip features Wetlands star Carla Juri walking gloomily through Manhattan with bloodied wrists.

Comments

Be the first to comment...

Editor's Picks

Dr. John

Dr. JohnSongwriter Interviews

The good doctor shares some candid insights on recording with Phil Spector and The Black Keys.

Laura Nyro

Laura NyroSongwriting Legends

Laura Nyro talks about her complex, emotionally rich songwriting and how she supports women's culture through her art.

Terry Jacks ("Seasons in the Sun")

Terry Jacks ("Seasons in the Sun")Songwriter Interviews

Inspired by his dear friend, "Seasons in the Sun" paid for Terry's boat, which led him away from music and into a battle with Canadian paper mills.

Michael Bolton

Michael BoltonSongwriter Interviews

Into the vaults for this talk with Bolton from the '80s when he was a focused on writing songs for other artists.

Donald Fagen

Donald FagenSongwriter Interviews

Fagen talks about how the Steely Dan songwriting strategy has changed over the years, and explains why you don't hear many covers of their songs.

Billy Joe Shaver

Billy Joe ShaverSongwriter Interviews

The outlaw country icon talks about the spiritual element of his songwriting and his Bob Dylan mention.