The Bed Song

Album: Theatre Is Evil (2012)
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  • We are friends in a sleeping bag splitting the heat
    We have one filthy pillow to share and your lips are in my hair
    Someone upstairs has a rat that we laughed at
    And people are drinking
    And singing Van Halen and Slayer on a ukulele tear

    Well, we found an apartment
    It's not much to look at
    A futon on a floor
    Torn-off desktop for a door
    All the decor's made of milk crates and duct tape
    And if we have sex
    They can hear us through the floor
    But we don't do that anymore

    And I lay there wondering, what is the matter?
    Is this a matter of worse or of better?
    You took the blanket, so I took the bedsheet
    But I would have held you if you'd only

    Let me

    Exhibit C
    Look how quaint
    And how quiet and private
    Our paychecks have bought us a condo in town
    It's the nicest flat around
    You picked a mattress and had it delivered
    And I walked upstairs
    And the sight of it made my heart pound
    And I wrapped my arms around me

    And I stood there wondering, what is the matter?
    Is this a matter of worse or of better?
    You walked right past me and straightened the covers
    But I would still love you if you wanted a lover
    And you said
    All the money in the world
    Won't buy a bed so big and wide
    To guarantee that you won't accidentally touch me
    In the night

    Now we're both mostly paralyzed
    Don't know how long we've been lying here in fear
    Too afraid to even feel
    I find my glasses and you turn the light out
    Roll off on your side
    Like you've rolled away for years
    Holding back those king-size tears

    And I still don't ask you, what is the matter?
    Is this a matter of worse or of better?
    You take the heart failure
    I'll take the cancer
    I've long stopped wondering why you don't answer

    You can certainly see how fulfilling a life
    From the cost and size of stone of our final resting home
    We got some nice ones right under a cherry tree
    You and me lying the only way we know
    Side by side and still and cold

    And I finally ask you, what was the matter?
    Was it a matter of worse or of better?
    You stretch your arms out and finally face me
    You say I would have told you

    If you'd only asked me
    If you'd only asked me
    If you'd only asked me Writer/s: Amanda Palmer
    Publisher: Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd.
    Lyrics licensed and provided by LyricFind

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