Three Point One Four

Album: Hooray For Boobies (2000)
Play Video
  • My last girlfriend didn't like me, thought she might be
    Most likely a dyke, she just didn't excite me
    Lefty? Yeah, but that was alright
    She was hotter than the sun, but she just wasn't that bright
    My mistake she was more flaky than a leper colony
    I think a wooden clothespin would have been much better company
    Ass like a donkey, acting funky, gave her "L" now she's a flunky
    So my love for her died quicker than a batch of Sea Monkeys
    Early bird gets the worm, spread your legs or spread the word
    So what if I'm not the smartest peanut in the turd
    I'm white, which goes with everything but I can come in any color
    And I'm looking for the kind of girl that reminds me of my mother
    But it's hard to find a girl with a viper tattooed on her tushy
    And how many girls do you know that can play the harmonica with their pussies?
    Like em' easy and hot, and sweet, like a Rice Krispie Treat, G
    You know what I really want in a girl? Me

    I need to find a new vagina
    Any kind of new vagina
    It's hard to rhyme a word like vagina
    Calvin Klein? Kind of North Carolina

    Women are like dog doo, hear me through, don't interrupt
    It's just the older that they are, the easier they get to pick-up
    I'd fill the generation gap, clean the cobwebs from her rafters
    Old hens would rather put out than be put out to the pasture
    No age just ain't a gauge, I like my girls like my cheese
    Preferably for me fat-free American singles only
    I want my next chick anorexic, the winner is the thinner
    Won't have to take her skinny ass out to a fancy dinner
    Like Sizzler, she got a beef, we'll chew the fat
    If I forget to put the seat up, I can put up with her crap
    Let her lash out and crack the whip, but not in bed I don't play rough
    No, I can't be tied down with a girl that wants me tied up
    Just independent like NOFX, smart like Janeane Garofalo
    She'd use big words to make fun of me so that I would never know
    Bestow upon me all her wisdom of the Dewey Decimal System, gee
    You know what I really want in a girl? Me

    I need to find a new vagina
    Any kind of new vagina
    It's hard to rhyme a word like vagina
    Kevin Klein? Kind of South Carolina

    Vagina, vagina, vagina, vagina
    Vagina, vagina, vagina, vagina Writer/s: James M. Franks
    Publisher: Universal Music Publishing Group
    Lyrics licensed and provided by LyricFind

Comments: 12

  • Cyberpope from Richmond, Canada3 digits; 4 characters.

    Some call the point a "significant digit"; I don't, but I remember they taught that as a variant in Algebra 10. . .
  • Jennifer from Liberty, ScI love this song... Im a female & it doesnt offend me @ all... I think its funny & he's not saying thats how women are he's saying thats what he's looking for ("im looking for the kind of girl that reminds me of my mother... But its hard to find a girl with a viper tattooed on her tushie & how many girls do you know that can play the harmonica with their pussy?" how the hell is that not funny? Lol)
  • David from Petaluma, CaTo Cassie:
    It's called selling out to change your style to suit the labels or fans or to be more radio friendly. Bloodhound Gang was asked to "tone it down" some before they played in, I believe, Switzerland. The bands answer was to cancel the show. That's integrity.
  • Randi from Culpeper, Valol oooooh i get it, James said 4 digits.... james its only 3
  • Randi from Culpeper, VaMatt and Alex,
    3.14= PI (thats like pre-algebra DUH!) Pie also means vagina .....Get it?
  • Amber from Birmingham, AlIf it's offensive don't listen to it. I'm a female and I think it's funny.
  • Cassie from Hamilton, NjI love Bloodhound Gang, but I do agree with Anastasia. They're a good band, but they could turn it down a little.
  • Anastasia from Anaheim, Cai don't want to be a stick in the mud or anything...and i'm not saying they're a bad band or anything...but, a lot of the crap they do is VERY insulting...especially the the female population. it's actually downright sick. i want to like them cuz some songs are catchy, but, it's too offensive.
  • Alex from Loveland, CoI was wondering the same thing as matt
  • Rico from Melbourne, AustraliaYeah What are you talking about James???
  • Adam from Sussex, EnglandFour significant figures, three decimal places. But a total of four digits.
  • Matt from Portland, OrUmmm, isn't "Three Point One Four" only three digits?
see more comments

Editor's Picks

Benny Mardones

Benny MardonesSongwriter Interviews

His song "Into The Night" is one of the most-played of all time. For Benny, it took him to hell and back.

Bob Daisley

Bob DaisleySongwriter Interviews

Bob was the bass player and lyricist for the first two Ozzy Osbourne albums. Here's how he wrote songs like "Crazy Train" and "Mr. Crowley" with Ozzy and Randy Rhoads.

Peter Lord

Peter LordSongwriter Interviews

You may not recognize his name, but you will certainly recognize Peter Lord's songs. He wrote the bevy of hits from Paula Abdul's second album, Spellbound.

Gavin Rossdale On Lyric Inspirations and Bush's Album The Kingdom

Gavin Rossdale On Lyric Inspirations and Bush's Album The KingdomSongwriter Interviews

The Bush frontman on where he finds inspiration for lyrics, if his "machine head" is a guitar tuner, and the stories behind songs from the album The Kingdom.

Spot The Real Red Hot Chili Peppers Song Titles

Spot The Real Red Hot Chili Peppers Song TitlesMusic Quiz

The Red Hot Chili Peppers have some rather unusual song titles - see if you can spot the real ones.

Hardy

HardySongwriter Interviews

The country hitmaker talks about his debut album, A Rock, and how a nursery rhyme inspired his hit single "One Beer."